Not That Easy
by Tanya is a Trampire
Summary: In this story, Edward has returned after "New Moon". Bella, having gone to Volterra to rescue him, is not content to just slip back into the previous dynamic of their relationship, and to be quite honest has next to no faith in Edward or them as a couple. Edward will find, in earning back her trust, that its not that easy! Rated M for language and Lemons! B/E HEA GUARANTEED
1. Chapter 1

**AN: In this story, Edward has returned after "New Moon". Bella, having gone to Volterra to rescue him, is not content to just slip back into the previous dynamic of their relationship, and to be quite honest has next to no faith in Edward or them as a couple. **

**It is up to Edward to earn her trust back whilst Bella is at her limit with him and the whole family's intrusion in their lives. Not only does she fear him leaving again, but is also tired of his constant rejection of her advances. This is no longer 1918!**

**BPOV:**

Opening my eyes was proving to be a difficult task to achieve. I had slept fitfully since Edwards's return, with the results showing in an even paler complexion and bags under my eyes that threatened to be the defining feature of my face.

Grunting irritably to myself I rolled over to turn off my alarm clock. Shrugging off the faint pang of melancholy I felt every morning at the absence of Edward in my room when I woke was getting easier and easier, a worrying fact in itself.

So far, well as far as I could prove, he had stuck to his banishment from my room. In what conceivable reality could he have possibly thought that things would automatically go back to where they were before he left me?

The joy that I felt when I saw him standing under that Clock Tower was quickly sobered by the events that followed. Seeing the man I loved being tortured repeatedly combined with the knowledge that at any second I could be eaten had left its mark. Like an unwanted imprint on my mind, I could not forget those images or the feelings I had of absolute terror when Caius implored for me to be killed there and then. My momentary joy at Alice's vision of me as a Vampire were again quenched by the reality that I could be facing immortal life alone, destined to spend the rest of my days watching everyone I care about die and knowing that there was nobody out there for me. Edward has been my one and only and in that one instant in the forest, irrevocably destroyed the absolute trust that I had once laid in him.

There were no excuses that I was going to readily accept, he could claim that it was done with my safety in mind, he could talk all he wanted to about leaving me so that I can lead a normal life. From where I stood it was clear as anything. The man that professed to love me until the end of time, took me into a forest, shattered my very reason for living and then ran like a dog with its tail between its legs. The gentleman from an era long forgotten showed that he has assimilated himself into modern society with absolute ease as he didn't even look over his shoulder to ensure my safety. If that is love, then I would hate to see the other side of the coin.

I showered quickly and perfunctorily, and dressed whilst the toast downstairs blackened in my absent-minded thoughts. Fortunately Charlie had left early for work. Not that I could blame him. If I had been difficult to live with during my lethargic reaction to Edwards leaving, then the mood swings that were typically associated with someone struggling with puberty must have had him on a knife edge. I silently vowed to work harder around him, none of this after all was his fault.

Noticing the time and sensing his inevitable arrival I went downstairs and silently opened the front door before turning on my heel to butter my now charcoaled toast. I felt his arms around me before I had even heard him take a step. I flinched involuntarily at the invasion of my space and felt him move away. Although I missed the comfort of his embrace it was too early in the morning for me to feel any remorse, it wasn't my fault that I felt this way. Turning around to face him I noted that the face that could quite easily dazzle me into a trance had lost the lopsided grin that I fell in love with.

"Sorry love", he muttered contritely, "I didn't mean to startle you".

This time the guilt did flood through me, I had agreed to give him another chance after all, how were we ever going to get close to repairing the rift between us if I shunned any contact at all from him.

"What are you apologising for", I replied with what I hoped to be an airy laugh. "You just made me jump that's all, hardly the crime of century, and you should know". I stuck my tongue out at him and he visibly relaxed. I scoffed inwardly at the people that said I couldn't lie, feeling a distinct relief at his inability to read my thoughts.

"Isabella", he started, shoulder slumped in despair. "You still can't lie." Damn, I thought to myself as he continued. "If I live for the rest of eternity, I will always regret what happened in that forest. I promise you that I will make this right, just please tell me what I need to do, and I will do it. I won't come into your bedroom at night as promised, you want immortality…it's yours. Just please tell me what I need to do to make this right again."

I instantly felt my anger levels rising as my pulse started to race, a fact he would have no difficulty in noticing.

I saw his mouth open to say something, but I never gave him the chance.

"Edward, for the love of God!" I said to him, in a voice that was so eerily calm it did not sound like my own. "I said that we could start again, which in the light of what did happen in that forest, is a fucking miracle in itself." I walked right up to him until we were less than a foot away from one another. I felt my anger soar as my voice started to increase in volume. "You however need to work out how to fix this, you crushed me that day, you took everything in my life that meant something and stamped all over it. You cannot simply expect me to have a magic cure as to how you need to act. My emotions are all over the place, half the time I want nothing more than to be curled up in your arms, whilst the rest of the time I can't stand to be around you. One action is not going to undo all the pain and suffering that you and your family have caused me."

"Bella, I…" he started to reply.

"No Edward", I stopped him, hearing my voice return to its normal pitch. "You _need_ to understand that there is no quick fix solution here. I am trying my hardest here, I really am, but offering me immortality, when I can't be sure in my mind that you won't run away again is not fair. To offer something I once wanted in this way is tantamount to bribery."

"I swear to you Bella, that was never my intention," he begged desperately. "I will earn your trust, I promise you, all I wanted was to show my commitment to you, I simply can be away from you anymore…" he trailed off weakly.

"Then let's go to school and try and have a normal day," I laughed at him somewhat ironically. When was there ever a normal day in the life of the Cullens? As he walked somewhat sedately to the couch to pick up my school bag, I winced momentarily at the thought of a day in a cramped building with the four of them. Though it had not been them to leave me, they went along with it with no hesitation. I expected as much from Rosalie, and Jasper have barely uttered a word in my direction. Emmett would follow Rosalie through fire if it made her happy, quite a declaration of love for a vampire. But Alice, she professed to be my best friend and just upped and left with the rest of them. Not a phone call, a text or even a lousy email. I instantly felt my emotions getting the better of me again. I forced myself to breathe deeply, trying to reign in the vitriol that fought its way out.

What was the matter with me? I had to get a grip on this and soon before I saw Jasper. The cursed empath would realise what was going on before I would be able to hide it. That was unacceptable.

"Ready to go love," Edward asked offering me his arm.

"Let's do it," I replied and graciously took his arm as we left.

**AN: As this is my first story, please be honest with your feedback. Is the story worth continuing?**

**Any ideas and suggestions about the story will be gratefully received!**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Firstly I would like to thank you all for the encouraging feedback, I have been informed by another author that the numbers if views I have received is very encouraging for a first chapter, especially from an unknown. As always, please feel free to comment with either positive or negative feedback.**

**BPOV:**

My sense of foreboding only increased as we approached the car park, and as Edward smoothly pulled up next to one of the many generic pickups I was acutely aware of the looks we were getting.

Its wasn't to be unexpected, I mused to myself, it was only a few weeks ago that I was walking around from lesson to lesson in a complete trance, oblivious to my surroundings and nonplussed by my friends attempts to lure me into conversation.

In hindsight I did wonder whether or not these so called attempts were for my benefit or designed in such a way to anger me into spilling my guts to the whole year about what happened. Needless to say, they were left disappointed, and it wasn't long before the faux attempts at conversation turned into spiteful gossiping behind my back. Only Angela stayed loyal, she seemed disgusted at the vitriol being spoken about me when I wasn't around and refused to be a part of it. She seemed more than content to just sit with me in silence when I was suffering through one of my spells of melancholy. She seemed never to take personal offence to my lack of enthusiasm with anything and on the rare occasions that conversation was initiated by herself, never took it to heart that the most she got out of me was a one word answer or grunt. Occasionally Ben would join us but as nice a boy as he was turning out to be, I think that my state of self-induced depression was more than he could handle. I never held it against him, he tried bless him.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to work out who the ring-leaders of this particular exercise were. They were the same people that had waited on the bottom step of the bleachers each day, desperate to work out what was going on between Edward and myself. The same people that were so desperate to try and work me out on my first day, probably only so that they could work out which if the high school stereotypes I was going to be placed in. It never ceased to amaze me, that no matter what school I had been to, there were always a select few, the self-appointed supremo's who would decide the social status of the rest of the year. Yet these pathetic lemmings fell into place, like a well drilled regiment of soldiers. Perfectly lovely young boys and girls started wearing dark clothing and eye liner, and why? Because they had been caught listening to The Sisters of Mercy after school one day, and were dubbed as Goths. The smart few that weren't scared to put their hands up in class were deemed to be Geeks, Nerds. Forever placed in the firing line of the popular kids.

My internal thoughts were interrupted as Edwards rushed around the front of the car to open my door for me. I had barely taken three steps when Fork's own leaders elect descended on me at such a pace, that had I not known, would have assumed supernatural. Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory, the future of Forks…heaven help them. Fake smiles were plastered over their thickly donned make up, which in all honesty was done in such a rush that it barely concealed the evidence that for these two, puberty had not been kind. As I looked up at them, surprise faintly registered that their faithful poodle Mike wasn't around. His desperate need to be seen normally meant that he was never far behind them.

"Bella!" Jessica exclaimed, with an excitement so fake that it was almost amusing. "How was your weekend? Did you spend it with Edward? I went to Port Angeles with Lauren, oh you should have been there. We went to the most amazing club and these two absolute hunks were all over us all evening. Obviously they had good taste, but just turned out to be creepy, they kept trying to offer us more alcohol. Then they were pushing up against us, and oh my god they then tried to persuade us to all go into the back of their van. I mean do they _know who we are?_ It would have been so good if you could have been there. They were much more your type than ours I am sure."

I managed with little success to fully decipher the rest of her monologue, she spoke at such a speed and without ever taking a breath, at one point I wanted to check her neck for gills.

I faked a cough to cover my laughter, as I turned to look at Edward my laughter quickly evaporated.

Though unnoticed by the pair of them his whole posture has stiffened, his arms were rigidly held against his side, and his eyes had turned jet black. He looked positively feral. I coughed quietly, far too subtly for the still rambling idiots in front of me to hear, but loudly enough for his Vampire hearing to pick up. "Ignore them," I mouthed at him.

Swallowing my mixed feelings for him, I gently walked over to Edward and allowed him to put his arm around me as I leaned into his embrace. I held my hand against his chest, willing him to try and calm down. Surely he couldn't be this angry purely as a result of what they were saying? Then it dawned on me. Their thoughts…. God only knows what the two of them must have been thinking about me, but it must have been bad enough to cause Edward to momentarily forget what he was. He held me tighter than he had ever done, almost to the point of discomfort and slowly led me around the pair of them. They were so consumed in their own thoughts and conversation that they barely registered our absence until we had gone no more than ten yards when even my hearing picked up Lauren hissing, "Stuck up bitch."

Edward froze as if paralyzed. I tried to move him with my arm, for all the good that did. I doubt he even registered the pressure on his lower back. His lips pulled back and he let out an almost silent snarl. I frantically looked around the schoolyard for anyone that could help. I bitterly realised that Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper had all, "graduated", the year before. What I didn't count on, however was my, "Bestie," Alice who appeared right by my side.

"Move you idiot," she hissed at Edward, leaving me more than just a little taken aback at her tone. "You almost cost us everything we have once, and now you are ready to do it again over a couple of preppy little girls, you are over one hundred years old, have you not learned anything?" She shoved him forcefully and he slowly started walking with us. By now his grip around my waist had almost become painful, I winced slightly as we walked through the doorway that led to our classroom. "…and for the love of god relax your grip on Bella, hold her much tighter and you will crack her ribs."

He released me without so much as a word of apology. I stared at him confused and more than a little shaken by the events of the last five minutes. I was going to open my mouth to ask him if he was okay when Alice jumped straight in again.

"Are you even going to apologise to her for the little _display? _ It's bad enough that you offered her immortality this morning but then when she is set upon by the school vultures, you just leave her there to fend for herself whilst you stand rigid in outraged protestation. Has she not gone through enough at your hands without the mixed signals, and don't you think that she…"

It left my mouth before I could even form the thoughts in my head, years later I would still never know where it came from.

"Enough," I screamed at her. "Who the fuck do you think you are to preach at Edward? For a start 'she' has a name, and 'she' is more than capable of speaking for herself. As it is apparent that you saw Edwards offer this morning, it is more than obvious that your saw my response. So in what world _you_ of all people think you can stand there and talk for me is quite honestly beyond me.

I turned to face Edward.

"What happened on that schoolyard Edward? You only hunted two nights ago, and I have seen you go much longer without that sort of reaction.

He looked at me long and hard before slowly nodding his head.

Alice gasped and started growling ominously, whatever she had seen had clearly not sat well.

**EPOV:**

As I looked down at her, I collected my thoughts. I had spent a decade hunting down the most obscene minds known to man. I had killed rapists, murderers and far worse but in all honesty, I had never come across the thoughts that I encountered earlier in children.

It was if the whole time I had been away played before me like a movie. I saw the state Bella had been in when I left her. Sunken eyes surrounded by dark rings that wouldn't look out of place on a vampire. Her usual pale complexion had faded so much that it almost appear translucent. Her shoulders were slumped as if carrying the weight of the world on them. All of this however paled against the look of dismal defeat in her face. That beautiful face that, had it been possible, would take my breath away. I had caused that.

The movie then moved on, showing me their cruel attempts at riling my Bella into an angry outburst, all under the pretence of friendly concern. I was briefly glad to see that Angela had not joined in. Hearing the thoughts of everyone you met, gave an almost sixth sense as to their personality on first sight. I was relieved to see that my views of her had been backed up when I saw the solid companionship she had offered. Not out of the approval of her peers but in spite of it.

Their attempts at conversation soon turned into whispered taunts as she walked past them. Jibes about my leaving and vile references to her appearance. Still she continued her day by day routine, seemingly oblivious to what was going on around her. The whispered taunts turned into open remarks, and "accidental" bumps as she walked past them. They were clever though, never appearing to do anything out of the ordinary around the teachers. Only appearing as a shoulder to cry on, and still she ignored them.

This was more than enough to cause my anger levels to increase but the next thought I read almost tipped me over the edge.

There were three of them huddled around a table in an empty classroom.

"What is it going to take," whined Lauren petulantly. "I was so sure that she would have reacted by now".

"I don't understand how she can be so hung up over Cullen," sulked the Newton boy. His mind had been one of the most visually vile I had encountered in year.

Jessica on the other hand looked completed undisturbed by their opinions.

"Oh I don't think it would take much to tip her over the edge," she drawled on, very aware of how the other two hung on her every word. "I think that perhaps a well-placed news article maybe, or a photo or two left around the school will be all it will take to finish her off. I had heard that her dad wanted her committed," she added, very satisfied at the open mouthed response she had received from Newton. "Personally, I think if we plan this well enough we can send her into a never ending spiral of depression and misery, then her dad will have no option but to farm her off to the loony bin. With any luck she may even save him the bother and just throw herself off the cliff!"

The other two gasped at this latest statement, their minds reeling over the possibility. Had Jasper been here, I doubt that even with his skill, he would have had no luck calming the sheer jealousy that came off the three of them. I was aware that both Jessica and Lauren had been hurt when their pathetic attempts at attention seeking towards me had failed, unfortunately for them, this only escalated when Bella encaptured my very being without even being aware of doing so. Newton had always struggled when Bella had turned him down, in his own mind he was a walking Adonis, and again this only got worse when she agreed to go with me.

As they worked their heads around what Jessica had just said, a dawning of comprehension appeared. With Bella out of the way, the school would mourn her loss, and who better to be the grieving party than the trio that tried so valiantly to save their friend from the depression she faced. They would be able to ride the crest of that particular wave for years to come.

It had been at that point that I had heard Bella's cough, bringing me out of their minds and back into reality. Had it been anyone else, there would have been no chance of me merely walking around them, but yet again she was there to save me. What I couldn't count for was the thoughts of Lauren as she whispered, "bitch," at my Bella, my saviour. All she could picture was Bella dead, laughing at the imagined reaction of Charlie whilst keeping up her façade for the months to come.

I was quite prepared to throw it all away and snap her pathetic little neck, Bella was right, I wasn't hungry in the slightest, not that I would ever contaminate my mouth with that harlots blood but I could have settled for two broken necks at my hand. Alice, unfortunately had seen this, and although unaware the reasoning behind my actions, saw that it would lead to only one thing. The arrival of the Volturi.

I heard Alice growl and surmised that through my intention to explain everything she finally understood what had almost been the reason for my undoing, the brief look of understanding and apology crossed her face and I felt her voice inside my head. "I'm so sorry Edward, I had no idea. But do you really think it's wise to tell her everything. Hasn't she suffered enough?"

The protective part of my nature screamed in agreement with her. A year ago I would never have entertained the idea, but now. Well now things were different. If Bella was ever going to trust me then I would have to be completely honest with her on everything.

"Before I tell you Bella, please understand that this goes far beyond spiteful school yard gossip, are you sure you want to know everything?"

I saw her eyes cloud over as she mulled my words, I caught the anger flash across her eyes as she misinterpreted my question for a negative answer.

I jumped in before she could comment, "Bella, please don't misunderstand, if you want me to, then I will tell you everything. I just have to warn you in advance that this is not going to be easy listening".

Yet again I saw her think over what I had said.

With a small voice, she replied. "It can't be worse than living the last year of my life without you there. No more secrets…please…it's the only way we will ever get back to where we were."

Buoyed by her verbal desire to repair the damage I had inflicted, I nodded my head once more and started.


End file.
